Why Sex Toys Are Worth Talking About

Sex toys are used by approximately half the adult population in most Western countries, yet they remain a subject many people feel uncomfortable discussing openly — even with their own partners. This guide exists to cut through that noise and give you practical, honest information to make confident, informed decisions.

Whether you're buying your first toy, upgrading an existing collection, or navigating this territory with a new partner, the fundamentals are the same: prioritise safety, quality, and communication.

Materials: What's Safe & What to Avoid

This is the single most important section of this guide. The sex toy industry is largely unregulated, which means unsafe materials are widely sold — often at low prices — without any consumer warning.

Body-Safe Materials (Always Buy These)

100% Body-Safe Silicone: The gold standard. Non-porous, hypoallergenic, heat-resistant, and easy to sanitise. Look for toys explicitly labelled "body-safe" or "medical-grade" silicone. Premium brands include Lelo, We-Vibe, and Satisfyer.

Borosilicate Glass: Non-porous, smooth, and can be used with any lubricant. High-quality glass sex toys are extremely durable and don't break under normal use.

Stainless Steel: Non-porous, hypoallergenic, and extraordinarily durable. Can be temperature-played with by warming or cooling under water.

Hard ABS Plastic: Used in many vibrators. Non-porous, body-safe, and easy to clean. Perfectly safe for external use.

Materials to Avoid

Jelly rubber, PVC, and "cyberskin" or "realistic" materials without body-safe certification are porous — meaning they cannot be fully sanitised. They may also contain phthalates. If a toy has a strong chemical smell when you open the package, return it.

Types of Sex Toys: A Full Breakdown

Vibrators

The most popular category. Vibrators range from small bullet vibrators (external, discreet, beginner-friendly) to wand massagers (powerful, external) to G-spot vibrators (internal, curved) to rabbit vibrators (dual-action internal and clitoral simultaneously).

Dildos

Non-vibrating insertable toys designed for penetration. Available in silicone, glass, and stainless steel. Glass and stainless steel dildos are temperature-compatible and excellent for sensory play.

Cock Rings & Penis Toys

Cock rings sit at the base of the penis to restrict blood flow and maintain firmness. Vibrating cock rings stimulate a partner simultaneously. Prostate massagers have seen enormous growth in popularity due to their impact on orgasm intensity.

Anal Toys

Butt plugs, anal beads, and prostate massagers. All anal toys must have a flared base — without one, a toy can become lodged internally and require medical attention. Non-negotiable safety rule.

BDSM Accessories

Restraints, blindfolds, paddles, and impact toys form the entry point for BDSM play. For couples exploring this territory, our bondage furniture guide covers structured play environments. Always prioritise consent, communication, and safe words above everything else.

Best Sex Toys for Couples

A growing category of toys is specifically engineered for couples — designed to be used during partnered sex, not instead of it.

Couples Vibrators

Wearable vibrators (like the We-Vibe Sync) are worn internally during penetrative sex, stimulating both partners simultaneously. Controlled via app for seamless use.

Vibrating Cock Rings

A bullet vibrator mounted in a stretchy ring worn at the base of the penis. Provides clitoral stimulation to a receiving partner during sex. Entry-level price point (most under $30) and beginner-friendly.

Positioning Furniture

A sex table with leg stirrups or positioning wedge dramatically expands the range of positions for couples, particularly valuable for those managing pain, mobility limitations, or size differences.

Lubricant Compatibility

Using the wrong lubricant with a sex toy can damage the toy and create a hospitable environment for bacteria. The rules are simple but important.

Water-Based Lube

Safe with all toys and all condoms. The universal default. Needs reapplication more frequently than silicone-based options, but for toy use this is rarely an issue.

Silicone-Based Lube

Not safe with silicone toys. Use only with glass, steel, or hard plastic toys. Excellent for anal play and longer sessions.

Oil-Based Lube

Not safe with latex or polyisoprene condoms. Safe with most non-porous toy materials. Coconut oil should not be used vaginally as it disrupts pH balance.

For a comprehensive breakdown of lubricant types and compatibility, see our Complete Lubricant Guide.

Cleaning & Storage

Proper toy hygiene is non-negotiable. The good news is that cleaning body-safe materials is straightforward.

Before and After Every Use

Wash toys with warm water and unscented, mild soap, or use a dedicated toy cleaner spray. Rinse thoroughly and dry completely before storage.

Deep Cleaning Non-Motorised Toys

Silicone, glass, and stainless steel toys without a motor can be boiled in water for 3 minutes, or placed in the dishwasher (top rack, no detergent, hot cycle). Never boil or dishwasher a toy with electronic components.

Storage Best Practices

Store clean, dry toys in individual cotton or satin pouches. Avoid storing multiple toys touching in a drawer, as some materials can react with each other over time.

Where to Buy & What to Look For

Buying from a reputable retailer is part of ensuring product safety. Cheap unbranded toys on marketplaces with no certification are a gamble with your health.

Reputable Brands to Know

Lelo, We-Vibe, Satisfyer, Dame, and Womanizer are consistently recommended by sex educators and healthcare professionals. Njoy and Crystal Delights for glass and steel. All these brands are explicit about their materials and safety testing.

What to Check Before Buying

Look for explicit "body-safe silicone" or "phthalate-free" labelling; a return policy; clear manufacturer information; and real customer reviews. If the price seems too good to be true for the materials claimed, it probably is.